2025: The Year I Chose Myself – and Everything Changed
If you had told me a year ago that I would end 2025 as a business owner twice over and a woman who finally feels at home in her own life, I would have laughed, cried, or maybe both. Because at the start of this year, I was barely holding myself together.
I began 2025 on a leave of absence from my 20-year career in government contracting, a career that had shaped my identity, my schedule, my stress levels, and, honestly, my sense of worth. I was burnt out in a way that felt cellular. I was sick, exhausted, unhappy, and deeply disconnected from myself. I didn’t know what was next, but I knew I couldn’t keep going the way I had been. Something had to give, and for the first time in my adult life, I let it be the job and financial security instead of my health or my sanity.
What I didn’t know then was that stepping away would become the catalyst for one of the biggest years of transformation I’ve ever lived through.
Somewhere in the fog of burnout, a spark of clarity appeared: What if I built something of my own? Not just one thing, but the two things that represented the two sides of my experience – the healer and the strategist.
And so, with equal parts terror and determination, I began pouring into Akamai Healing, my holistic wellness business that I had formalized as an LLC six months prior, and I created MAB Consulting, a new government contracting consulting LLC.
Akamai Healing became the heartbeat of my year, spending nearly every waking minute on it. I dedicated my life to it – my intuition, my training, my creativity, my courage. And it grew. Not slowly, not gently, but in a way that felt like the universe saying, “Yes. This. Keep going.” I grew Akamai tenfold in 2025. Ten. Times. Over. I still have moments where I sit back and think, How did I do that? But the truth is, I did it by showing up scared, trying things that failed, trying again, showing up imperfectly, and showing up anyway.
While I had been seeing the occasional private Reiki client for a few years, this year I put a lot of energy into growing that client base, and I also began teaching Reiki and offering attunements, something that felt both humbling and deeply aligned. I expanded my breathwork facilitation and watched clients transform in front of me. I graduated from my 200‑hour yoga teacher training and started teaching regular classes at two local studios. Entering into the yoga world remains a scary hurdle for me; I often feel not good enough, not equipped enough, not educated enough … but I continue to challenge myself to learn more, so hopefully one day, I feel more worthy of this sacred tradition.
And then came Re+Center, my signature event – a blend of restorative yoga, Reiki, breathwork, and sound healing. It was the first time I created something that felt like a pure expression of my soul’s work. Watching people melt into that experience, watching them release and soften and reconnect, was one of the most fulfilling moments of my year.
Making Peace With My Past Career
Even as Akamai blossomed, I still had to navigate my complicated relationship with government contracting. At the start of the year, I had what I can only describe as PTSD‑like reactions to the idea of returning to full-time work in Corporate America. The stress, the culture, the pace – it all lived in my body in a way that felt raw.
I spent months trying to find any kind of part-time work that would pay enough to sustain my family financially while allowing time for Akamai and not burning me out again. I have yet to find that magical job, so I came up with the best compromise I could think of – stay in government contracting (it does pay the bills) but not work for someone else. Government contracting is volatile, especially right now, but doing it in a corporate atmosphere is worse. So I created MAB Consulting LLC and began taking on clients of my own – no boss to answer to, no mind-numbing corporate “all hands” calls to attend, the ability to set boundaries that are actually respected … while it’s still not my dream job, it is worlds better than it used to be.
MAB experienced unpredictable workloads, thanks to our shitshow of an administration; I had a summer with very little work, which was stressful in its own way. But instead of spiraling, I learned to breathe through it. I learned to trust myself and the support of my family. And I learned that I could hold both: the healing work that lights me up and the consulting work that still has a place in my skillset.
By the end of the year, I made peace with it. I stopped seeing government contracting as the enemy and started seeing it as one part of my story, not the whole thing, and something that allows for true balance in my working life.
The Personal Side of Transformation
Professionally, 2025 was massive. But personally? It was equally intense.
My husband, Josh, spent most of the year working out of town. That meant I was essentially a “single mom” to a teenage daughter – managing school drop‑offs, pick‑ups, after‑school activities, meals, the house, the emotional labor, all of it. There were days I felt like I was barely keeping my head above water. There were nights I cried from sheer exhaustion. And yet… I did it. I kept us afloat. I kept myself afloat. And I’m proud of that.
And despite the distance and the stress, Josh and I are in the best place we’ve been in years. We both left toxic work environments. We both chose our happiness over our paychecks. We cut our household income in half to follow our dreams – and somehow, we’ve never been happier. There’s a soft kindness between us, a shared sense of purpose that feels like a gift. I am a lucky woman to have Josh next to me.
Reclaiming My Body and My Health
Another huge part of my transformation has been my relationship with my body. After sitting at an unhealthy weight for years, I’ve lost 80 pounds over the last few years. But 2025 was the year I learned how to maintain it – not through restriction or punishment, but through awareness, compassion, and consistency. I’m still learning. I’m still healing. But I’m proud of the woman I see in the mirror now, and not because of the number on the scale, but because of the strength, the resilience, and the self‑respect she carries.
The Year I Chose Courage Over Comfort
If I had to sum up 2025 in one sentence, it would be this: I took risks while melting down, terrified, and unsure – and I kept going anyway.
I cried. I panicked. I doubted myself constantly. I had moments where I wanted to quit everything and run back to the familiar. But I didn’t. I stayed. I trusted. I kept choosing the version of me I wanted to become.
And because of that, my life did a near 180‑degree turn this year.
I’m ending 2025 proud of myself in a way I’ve never felt before. Not because everything was easy, but because so much of it was hard, and I did it anyway.
Looking Ahead to 2026
I don’t know exactly what 2026 will bring, but for the first time in a long time, I’m excited to find out. I feel aligned. I feel grounded. I feel like I’m finally living a life that reflects who I am and not who I thought I had to be.
2025 was the year I chose myself.
2026 is the year I get to build from that choice.
And I can’t wait.